Kidney Stones

So this is what they look like. They are small and as sharp as glass when you pass them. Its worse pain then giving birth. I know i did both in the same week i can honestly say that. So they are not your friend you don't want them! I on the other hand have to learn to like them. In estimation i have had around 35-40 of them so far. Its come down to a genetic dysfunction. They get worse with every pregnancy and bigger. For example a normal person can pass one that is between 1-3 mm I have never passes anything bigger then a 4mm. My last stone they went in to break up was not in mm it was in cm. It was 1.6cm. That like a really big diamond. So i went in for lithotripsy again and they used the laser and broke it up into smaller hopefully passable sizes. Once i get my left side taken care of well then its time for the right side i have six stones in my right side all different sizes. Its so not fun but its life. My biggest fear, that my kidney can only take so much stress and surgery and getting beat up before it quits. So hopefully one of my five brothers and sisters are a blood match because worse case i need a kidney transplant, thank goodness for medical science. But in all seriousness i received a amazing blessing from my husband and i know everything will be fine and work out just fine. Besides whats the scripture D&C 38:30 ? if you are prepared you shall not fear. I feel OK with everything now in my life. Thank goodness for a bigger plan which includes that wonderful thing called repentance... huh mom... we where just talking on the way home about repentance and how no one is perfect but those who use it become better stronger people. as the saying goes "good lumber is hard to find, the harder the wind blows the stronger the tree grows" . Oh and how we all have our trials and our weaknesses.

found this video,

This was the crazeist pregnancy ever. I have never had a baby that was so active. i could just sit and watch her move.

the secret

so the best thing about today was the fact that we got to go to Church. Ty was so cute we got to put her hair in her first pony tails. it was exceptionally cute. considering she is six weeks old and has pony tails. The kids went to there new primary classes and Keylee and Blake are no longer in nursery. They both did really good until they started to hand out balloons to those who has birthday and they really wanted one. but other then that the transition was really good. We love our ward. we have some dear friends, hi Becky :) and i have had great visiting teachers. Tj has allot of friends and growing up in this area he has people he already new and people that new his family. even out bishop new his grandfather really well. The girls love being her because they get to play in the snow. Which being in the valley they don't have. We got them in there boots ski pants hats gloves and coats and its still cold. but its snow. We watched a interesting video tonight it was called "The secret" Its not a movie that you see in the theater. But some thing you buy from Barnes and Noble. Basically it tells you about how you get what you put out. The law of attraction, you reap what you sow, how ever you word it it's true. Tj and I then talked about how it related to our life and the church. And what we wanted to change in it. so we both busted out with our journals and started writing our goals etc. If you have seen you know what we are talking about. If not go find it and watch it. It remind us that we control everything in our life all the good and all the bad. We cant be accountable for each other just our selves. So now we will see what new and amazing things happen. Anyone needs to borrow it let us know.

babies sleep so weird

a new ring

Wow so my hubby is really good at spoiling me! so we had talked about getting new ring when we got sealed in the temple. Well he jumped the gun. We went together with my parents on friday night for date night. It was the first time we have been as a couple. It was so nice. i cant express how wonderful it is. Be both talked on the way home about how this time for the both of us was like a book being opened and read clear to us. why is that maybe we are finally in tune with the way our lifes should be? But one things for sure we walked away from it both saying "i love you more" why is that? becuase god is the only thing that will and can keep relationships together. God HAS to be the foundation of it or it will slowly unravel. We are human so natually we care about worldly things and often get caught up in them even when we dont realize that we do. not until we find our self fighting with our spouse over stupid things. The best quote i have ever heard went like this " Stop arguing over whos right and start discussing whats right" if we all where foucussed on whats right not who is right how many less fights would we have with our spouse or other people in our lives? something to think about!

new baby pictures

So we finally got to get hadlees ty picture taken and they turned out so good, its to bad it cost so much to have them. but they last forever i guess.

One thing i am learning is nothing melts tj heart faster then this new little girl. The other night he walked in and gave me a kiss like usual, but the first words out if his mouth was. "where is my little princess" and he went right in the room and picked her up. He cant stop kissing her either and everytime she gets a bath, well she has to shower with her dad, she loves loves loves them, yesterday she actaully fell asleep while in there with him. Its a great thing! And i think after we go to the temple tomorrow it will make us all closer.

Split personalities

so our bishop who is excellent, had a nice little talk with Tj two Sundays ago. It was about how people have "split personalities", why would this matter you might ask, well unfortunately we have one of those people in our life's. I didn't really think much about it being a real problem with people until now.
So people with this chemical imbalance most of the time don't or wont recognize they have it. They really DON'T LIVE IN REALITY. They think what ever they believe is true, and they can actually have the truth in every form laid out in front of them and they wont believe it. They come across to everyone as a liar, because they are one but they don't believe it. They have intense mood swings and often use people, lie, cheat and steal. Because in there mind its OK. They can be that great church going person on Sunday but on Saturday night they where at the bar drinking (sound familiar yet?)
The worse is the lying there is usually no extent to it or the damage it can cause. They have relationships that don't really exist with people who don't really care about them. They steal things they think is theres. Most of the time they can talk there way in our out of anything. You would hope that there family would intervene and help them and recognize the situation for what it is, but sadly enough they don't.
Bishop said they dealt with a man in our community who did the same thing, the tragic ending was he committed suicide he literally went crazy.
So my question is how much is a chemical imbalance and how much is just loving the drama and attention. They usually have a addictive personality, they are addicted to the drama, the alcohol the cigarettes, the men, the lies.
So where is line? is She really crazy? or bi polar? or does she just have multiple personalities? Or does she just love being like this? guess we will never know......... although everyone that really knows her and has dealt with her over the last few years knows the truth. all our votes are on multiple answers!
At least people like the bishop have been able now to see the truth, because although she cant see the lies she tells others can.